holiday hell / yes you are right

i wanted to make a block print for the winter holidays.  since i live in a cultural wasteland, my choices for art supplies are a stationers that has been going out of business for several years and michaels craft store.

i was closer to michaels.

to the salesperson:  i am looking for a linoleum block to make a print.

salesperson:  what is that for?

me:  you carve it, ink it, and make a print from it.

salesperson:  we dont sell that.

me:  yes you do.

salesperson:  no we dont.

me:  yes you do.  i know you do.

salesperson:  we got rid of everything that didnt sell.

me:  no you didnt.  you have it, i just cant find it.

salesperson:  try another salesperson.

me:  i cant find another salesperson.

salesperson:  (walking away, disgusted exhalation)

to next salesperson:  :  i am looking for a linoleum block to make a print.

salesperson:  what is that for?

me:  you carve it, ink it, and make a print from it.

salesperson:  we dont sell that.

me:  yes you do.

salesperson:  no we dont.

me:  yes you do.  i know you do.

salesperson:  how do you know we sell it?

me:  other people have bought it here.

salesperson:  in this store?

me:  yes ( i lied).

salesperson:  well we dont sell that anymore.

me:  yes you do.

salesperson:  I will ask the manager.

salesperson on walky talky mic:  do we sell linoleum blocks?

salesperson to me:  whats it for?

me:  you carve it, ink it, and make a print from it.

salesperson (after repeating and a pause):  we dont sell that.

me:  yes you do.

salesperson:  no we dont.

me:  yes you do.  i know you do.

me:  do you have a brayer?

salesperson:  what is that?

me:  you use it to roll ink on the block to make a print.

salesperson:  we dont sell that.

me:  yes you do. can you show me where the ink is?

salesperson:  ink for what?

me:  (pause)  ink to make a print from a linoleum block.

salesperson:  we dont sell that.

me:  yes you do.  can you show me where there is any ink?

salesperson:  aisle thirteen.

me:  can you show me?

salesperson:  (walking to  aisle fourteen, exhalation of disgust)

salesperson:  (leading me back to aisle thirteen) this is not what you want.

me:  this says ink for linoleum block prints.  these are five sizes of linoleum blocks. these are two sizes of brayers.  this is a kit of carving tools for carving linoleum blocks to make a print.  perfect.  thank you.

salesperson:  (walking away, exhalation of disgust)

cashier:  (as i set down a pile of merchandise) did you find everything you need?

me:  (steely stare)

cashier:  (after ringing six items) we cant sell this.  (she was holding the linoleum block)

me:  yes you can.

cashier:  it doesnt have a tag.

me:  yes it does, you just scanned it.

cashier:  but nothing happens.  we dont sell this.

me:  yes you do.

cashier:  (on walky talky mic to manager, sounding out the words) do we sell linoleum blocks?

manager:  i already told him we dont.

me:  (walking out of the store)  and you are right. (exhalation of disgust)